Still waiting desperately for companies to call me for an interview. Hoping to get something soon. I'm not losing hope this time I have two little girls depending on me.
For the past week now I've been at my computer filling out job applications online with companies I know and also filling out applications for government assistance. I should get some help from the government I mean there are so many out there that abuse the system and get more than they need all I want is for my kids to eat and have some heat for the winter is that so much to ask?
Like I said before, I never imagined I would be one to ask the government for assistance. I was always good at saving money. I never really splurged on anything even when I had money except on my kids of course but not really for me. I've never been selfish. Growing up I had to share with my two sisters and brother and many times I rather they had something and I didn't.
My family is great. We've always been there for each other financially, physically and mentally. We've always been hard working people. My parents owned a laundromat and worked day and night to put my sisters, my brother and me through college. We grew up understanding that money doesn't grow on trees. My dad always said that hard work always paid off which was why going to college was so important to him.
Ok, with that said I've always found ways to manage my money but now it's almost impossible. I have to make sure we have enough to pay the mortgage and a majority of my bills. I feel bad for my husband because he's working so hard to try to make ends meet but it's just impossible without my contribution. I pray every day and night that something will come along for me and everything will be almost normal again but given the state of our economy it doesn't look all that great.
I am very hopeful though because I keep hearing people getting into new jobs every day so maybe with some perseverance and hard work I might be lucky too. For now I will keep applying for jobs online and keep checking in with my employment agencies. I will also continue to apply for any government assistance I can possibly qualify for without looking too needy which unfortunately I am. But I believe there will be a light at the end of this tunnel and I will find a new job to help support my family.
Thursday, September 29, 2011
Tuesday, September 27, 2011
Unemployed and miserable
I've been unemployed for over 2 yrs now...I became a stay at home mom as soon as I was laid off and became miserable. This isn't me. I've been out working since I was 8 yrs old and I've never been the stay at home type.
Don't get me wrong I love my kids and love spending time with them but this just isn't me.
This is all my fault. If I had started looking for a new job when I first got laid off I wouldn't be in this predicament. Unfortunately I like many others went into a depression only I didn't know it was a depression.
My husband saw it but decided to say nothing he figured I'd get out of this "funk" I'm in and be myself again.
Well I guess his plan didn't work because it just kept getting worse. I didn't want to do anything.
I think if he had stepped up and said "honey I think you should start looking for a new job" but instead he left me alone to stew in my own depression.
I can't really blame him for that...no, really I can't. I just didn't know I was depressed I mean I didn't feel any different than I usually did.
Anyways, now we're in a predicament. We're struggling to pay our mortgage and the bills.
It used to be so easy when I worked I paid all the bills and the mortgage and whatever my husband made in his business paid for entertainment and fun. Well, now that's all gone. We've exhausted all our savings just to keep up with the mortgage and bills because he's the only one with an income now.
I just applied for Masshealth and got approved for it so we have free healthcare. That's a load off my mind I mean everyone needs health insurance sometimes and I just wanted to make sure we had some just in case.
I never thought I'd be one to need government assistance but here I am begging for help.
Today I applied for food assistance so I can feed my kids. I feel ashamed to do it but my kids need to eat and we just don't make enough to pay for the bills, the mortgage and food. I'm also working on getting some fuel assistance for the winter because last year we spent so much heating the house that there's no way we'd be able to afford it again til I get a new job. My husband actually suggested we try to clean out the fireplace and use that to heat the house this winter but unfortunately I don't think it would heat the entire house so once again begging for government assistance. I mean if the government is giving money out to people who don't live in this country then I shouldn't have trouble getting help right? Yeah, right...do you know how hard it is to get government assistance? It took almost 4 months to get approved for Masshealth and who knows how long it's gonna take to get food assistance or fuel assistance.
So anyways, I've been applying to jobs online like crazy hoping to find something soon. I also work with 3 employment agencies and so far still nothing. I'm not giving up though because I have two beautiful little girls who are depending on me.
Don't get me wrong I love my kids and love spending time with them but this just isn't me.
This is all my fault. If I had started looking for a new job when I first got laid off I wouldn't be in this predicament. Unfortunately I like many others went into a depression only I didn't know it was a depression.
My husband saw it but decided to say nothing he figured I'd get out of this "funk" I'm in and be myself again.
Well I guess his plan didn't work because it just kept getting worse. I didn't want to do anything.
I think if he had stepped up and said "honey I think you should start looking for a new job" but instead he left me alone to stew in my own depression.
I can't really blame him for that...no, really I can't. I just didn't know I was depressed I mean I didn't feel any different than I usually did.
Anyways, now we're in a predicament. We're struggling to pay our mortgage and the bills.
It used to be so easy when I worked I paid all the bills and the mortgage and whatever my husband made in his business paid for entertainment and fun. Well, now that's all gone. We've exhausted all our savings just to keep up with the mortgage and bills because he's the only one with an income now.
I just applied for Masshealth and got approved for it so we have free healthcare. That's a load off my mind I mean everyone needs health insurance sometimes and I just wanted to make sure we had some just in case.
I never thought I'd be one to need government assistance but here I am begging for help.
Today I applied for food assistance so I can feed my kids. I feel ashamed to do it but my kids need to eat and we just don't make enough to pay for the bills, the mortgage and food. I'm also working on getting some fuel assistance for the winter because last year we spent so much heating the house that there's no way we'd be able to afford it again til I get a new job. My husband actually suggested we try to clean out the fireplace and use that to heat the house this winter but unfortunately I don't think it would heat the entire house so once again begging for government assistance. I mean if the government is giving money out to people who don't live in this country then I shouldn't have trouble getting help right? Yeah, right...do you know how hard it is to get government assistance? It took almost 4 months to get approved for Masshealth and who knows how long it's gonna take to get food assistance or fuel assistance.
So anyways, I've been applying to jobs online like crazy hoping to find something soon. I also work with 3 employment agencies and so far still nothing. I'm not giving up though because I have two beautiful little girls who are depending on me.
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